“Book 1: My Charmed Ones! – Chapter 5”
By: (Mister) Jimmie Ray Giboney.
Chapter 5: “A Fresh New Episode Of…Well, We’re Not Sure Anymore!”
Part 1: “Dinner with the Charmed Ones of Halliwell Manor”
The Bennet Sisters, but also known as the Halliwell Sisters, since the divorce of their parents consisted of, Piper Halliwell Wyatt, Phoebe Halliwell (former married name “Turner”) and their half-sister, Paige Matthews. There was a Prudence Halliwell Bennet, “Pru” for short, but she died a few years back. Piper, Phoebe, and Paige were at home in “Halliwell Manor”. Baby Wyatt Matthew Halliwell was upstairs asleep in his bed, as the adults were in the kitchen. Chris Halliwell and Leo Wyatt were absent. Since the unfortunate demise of Pru Halliwell, these three were the new “Power of Three Charmed Ones”. They were busy making dinner for tonight. Meanwhile, Chris was with Leo, debating his future existence. Phoebe’s and Paige’s beaus were busy somewhere doing whatever it is they do, when they aren’t with Phoebe and Paige.
Chris had come to the Present from the Future to prevent his older brother Wyatt from becoming an evil tyrant. It took some doing but he succeeded. But in so doing their parents separated and divorced. So with the help of his aunts, Phoebe and Paige, who learned by accident who Chris was, they managed to reunite Piper and Leo, so that Piper would become pregnant with Chris. Piper and Leo learned about this. Now they had another paradox to deal with.
Namely, if the Future has been changed from the way it was when Chris left it, should he go back? Or would there be a different version of Chris already? If Chris could access that version of the Future in the first place? If there was even such a Future, for it was still uncertain as to whether or not Wyatt had been saved from every possible source of evil that could turn him. Or at least simply the most feasible out of every possibility. When Magic existed, then there were more alternatives to consider. On and on they debated.
Marshall, Will, and Holly…err, uh. I mean, Piper, Phoebe, and Paige. As they made their meals, they were talking as usual. They also had the “RCA™ Kitchen Television” set on; in case of a news bulletin they may need to know about. The table was set with the utensils and plates. It was just waiting for the dishes to be set on it as well.
The salad was set was being set now, with the soup soon to follow. Pasta was the main course, and ice cream was the dessert. The breadsticks, meant to be the appetizers, didn’t last long. They had been nibbled during the meal preparations and so none were left. Piper was still breastfeeding Wyatt, and now she was pregnant again. So no wine tonight.
From the television they heard a news bulletin. “This just in! American Eagle Airlines’ Flight 22, a commuter shuttle from San Francisco to Oakland and back, has been reported as missing. It had been overdue by one hour now. Authorities from the ‘Federal Aviation Administration’ are working with officials from the airline company, to determine what happened. Meanwhile friends and family anxiously await details. Officials from ‘Homeland Security’, do not believe this to be terrorist related, but won’t rule it out at this juncture. Believed to be aboard the flight, is comedian and producer, Andy Dick Wolf. The production meeting he was scheduled to attend has been postponed until more is learned of his fate. Stay tuned to us, and we will keep you updated.”
Phoebe channel surfed at that moment, to see how many channels were covering the event. All of the channels that had news divisions had mentioned it. While those that didn’t were still showing their regular, scheduled programming. Phoebe didn’t get any vibes, as she returned to the TV channel she started with. The one her own show was aired on of course. Her sisters watched her do this, whispering to each other about how sad it was. Not just for the celebrity, but for the others aboard the aircraft too. Phoebe called her station and then her newspaper. Both owned by her billionaire beau. She used his connection to get more details about the event. When she was satisfied, she came to her sisters and told them all she had learned. If the relatively small airplane had crashed, then it was sad. But unless Magic was involved, it was out of their jurisdiction. Chris or Leo would stop whatever it was they were doing, to Orb in and tell them if they were needed.
There are two definitions of “girl”. None of these three females were children anymore, so they didn’t qualify for Definition One. However, for Definition Two, Paige still qualified never having been married to anyone just yet. Piper had married Leo. Phoebe had married Cole. Cole was dead. But Phoebe wasn’t a widow, because the divorce papers had been signed by both parties before Cole’s death. Now she had Justin as a possible husband to be. Piper was getting back with Leo. So Paige was the last girl. Her relationship with Richard was still up in the air, as they say.
The one girl and the two women sat the last of the dishes on the table. Piper summoned Leo and Chris to come join them if they wanted to. Phoebe and Paige went upstairs to get Wyatt. Since Paige Orbed them up, instead of walking; they were up and back in almost no time. As it was, Leo, and Chris, Orbed in on their own power, at the same moment Paige with Phoebe and Wyatt returned. So Piper was treated to a razzle and dazzle show of blue light!
Wyatt was placed in his high chair, in between his father and mother, by both Phoebe and Paige. Leo popped open the bottle of sparkling cider and then filled the drinking glasses. Piper fetched a bottle of her own breastmilk from the refrigerator, so Wyatt could have something to drink, even as they would be feeding him baby food from jars. Chris tossed the salad, and served it. He felt literally weird about this situation. His mother was pregnant with himself! Should he bring this up in conversation? Or should he keep such thoughts to himself? Paradoxes invited headaches! Also, why didn’t the Leprechaun nanny ever join them for meals? Didn’t she get lonely?
The television volume was loud enough to be understood, but low enough to allow dinner conversation. They could hear the network announcer just fine. But of course during the annoying commercials the volume seemed louder! Some reality dating game show was on. By the end of the hour of the program, the family had finished their dining. Now the nanny appeared, to take Wyatt for his post meal bath time. He was still a messy eater! Cute! But messy! The nanny had her work cut out for her. Chris wondered if she would be bathing him eventually. Piper was going to help bathe Wyatt. The rest began to clear the table, taking stuff back to the kitchen for cleaning. The in-between shows commercials were airing now.
The kitchen clean-up assembly line was forming. From Chris’s point of view, it was strange to hear his elders complain about doing dishes manually, when as a child he had been told that this was character building for him, and that he shouldn’t use Magic, and so on and so forth. Ironic, they were treating him as an adult, when he wasn’t even born yet! But not just that, they didn’t seem to be conscious or aware that they were not treating him as the same person Piper was pregnant with. That they were behaving in ways he shouldn’t be seeing! He’s a nephew! He’s a son! How come he wasn’t fading away anyway? If he came from a Future that didn’t exist anymore, so he couldn’t return to it, and there wasn’t room for him in the new Future, because he was already there, shouldn’t this version of himself that he was, not exist anymore? Another headache! He was one of his own bodyguards! Well, at least he wasn’t looking down at his own gravesite! But he had a girlfriend in the Future and he missed her. He wanted to get back to her soon. He didn’t know if she were dead or alive, or ceased to exist at all.
Chris was home, yet he was homesick. He knew he had to stop feeling sorry for himself too.
You know, depending on how many combined broadcast and cablevision channels you have, you can create some funny sentences just by channel surfing! Sometimes this is intentional, sometimes coincidental. With so many people to help do dishes, they were done quickly. So Paige and Phoebe were going to play with the little television set, to demonstrate for Leo what they were saying about making funny sentences. But the commercials were over now for this channel, and the next program was about to begin, and so when it did, Paige and Phoebe stopped the game.
Part 2: “Do You Believe In Magic?”
The television speakers, well the networks announcer’s voice via the television speakers, started promoting the episode. The man’s soothing voice said, “Now on the home of the Frog, the ‘WB’ is proud to present the fantasy crossover, fans have been calling for! It is an evening of Magic when the cast of characters from the Fantasy drama series, ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ and its spin-off series ‘Angel’, meet with the cats of characters from the other Fantasy drama series, ‘Charmed’! With a special appearance by ‘Sabrina the Teenage Witch’ star Melissa Joan Hart! Stay tuned for the world television broadcast premier of, ‘Do You Believe in Magic?’ beginning now!”
Of course they were familiar with the Judy Garland classic movie, “The Wizard of Oz”, and the current Harry Potter phenomenon. They were familiar with the Barbara Eden classic television show, “I Dream of Jeannie” and Elizabeth Montgomery’s competing classic television show, “Bewitched!” and its spin-off starring David Hartman’s daughter Lisa Hartman in, “Tabitha”. They knew about the James Stewart movie classic, “Bell, Book & Candle”. They knew about Catherine Hicks’ sitcom too known as, “Tucker’s Witch” when she played “Amanda Tucker”. They knew about the current “NBC” daytime dramas, “Passions” and “Days Of Our Lives”. They knew about the Disney Animated Movie Classics, based on “The Brothers Grimm” books. They knew of a lot of movies and television programs with a Magical theme.
They even knew about “Casper & Wendy”, “Hocus Pocus”, “Teen Witch” and “The Witches of Eastwich” and “Practical Magic”. They had watched or viewed them all and even critiqued them. They had seen the block of crossing-over series that consisted of the show “Hercules: The Legendary Journeys” and its spin-offs, “Xena: Warrior Princess”, “Young Hercules”, and “Amazon High”. But they didn’t know about the titles mentioned for this made-for-television movie!
Where had they been when these shows had apparently aired before?! But what was more alarming to them of course, was hearing the word, “Charmed”! Now how could that be?! Who knew?!
The movie began, and appropriately enough the theme song for the movie was “Do You Believe In Magic?” audible as the opening credits were shown with cartoon-style animation. There was no prologue or teaser. The animation style for the montage was very similar to what they were used to seeing for both “Bewitched!” and “I Dream of Jeannie”, or “The Nanny” for that matter. A very nice homage to those series! By now everyone had moved into the living room to use the bigger television set. They were intrigued! Even Chris forgot about his problems for now. The little nanny returned with a cleaner Wyatt, so they could watch the movie too. Leo and Piper sat with Wyatt between them, on the loveseat. The rest of them sat as well as they could sit on what was left to sit on. The problem was everyone wanted the best seat to view from. It was like they were being drawn towards the television set.
A very cute blonde, introduced herself as being “Sabrina Spellman”, but not as “Sabrina Sawyer”. Beside her was a black cat who introduced himself as “Salem Saberhagen”. That was a lot of “S” names! They explained who they were and what they were about. Then they explained the premise of the movie. So Sabrina and Salem were hosting? It was going to be one of those types of movies?! Well, they weren’t kids, but they’d watch it anyway! What the heck?! Some popcorn magically appeared for the family. Coincidently enough, Sabrina zapped some popcorn for her and Salem to eat as they watched the movie too. This felt natural enough. No cause for alarm there. (Paige did it for them by Orbing in the popcorn from the kitchen! She had simply said, “Popcorn!”)
What did alarm them then? When they saw themselves on the television! But not just them! There was Pru, still alive! But Paige’s name was now, “Pepper Ann”, like the “ABC One Saturday Morning” cartoon show character?! Phoebe was now “Paige”, and the one being called “Phoebe” had them curious too! Who was she?! She looked like “WB” actress Lori Rom! The opening credits hadn’t divulged acting credits, just studio names and creator names, and the name of the band singing the theme song. The main credits would be held for last apparently. Then probably squished vertically to the right side, for promotional and/or commercial footage to be displayed more prominently in the center. The movie version of them also had a cat like Salem. They lived in a space colony?! No sign of Leo, Wyatt, or Chris? They had the same husband and were advocates of polygamy?! San Francisco had been destroyed?!
Then they were shown the Rads. They were shown the tunnels. Now they were watching the stand-off. The movie versions of them were confused too. They thought they knew the two male vampires, and then they decided that they didn’t! While the two male vampires didn’t even know them, but seemed to find them sexually appealing at least. How did they get from San Francisco to Los Angeles, just using sewer system tunnels anyway? They weren’t connected, were they? Hey, had there been any commercial breaks yet?! Were they recording this?! They weren’t! Uh, oh! Somebody better begin recording the movie! So somebody fumbled with the various remote controls until they got something to show a display signifying that they were using “Quick Record”. Just in time for the others to arrive on both sides. Two blondes named “Harmony” were looking at each other, very intently and adoringly as if aroused by what each was looking at, yet still worried and suspicious about each other.
The three guys looked like they were looking at some ghosts at least, if not all ghosts. This must be how Oscar® nominees feel when they watch Billy Crystal interact in their movie, and other not nominated but out that year, as his own version of some of the characters! Who were those actresses that looked so much like them?! How come they didn’t know of them from before?! Leo, Chris and the Leprechaun nanny were getting asked so many questions! Was that how they really looked to other people?! Butts and all?! Did they really sound like that too?! Who had the fetish for the superheroine outfits?! What was going on in general anyway?!
When Chris thought he had heard someone ask, “Why is the sky blue?!” that was it for him! He Orbed out and went to his place for some peace and quiet so that he could think. When Leo heard the question of, “Why is the sky blue?” he gave the old joke answer, “Because it is sad.”, and only when he thought he heard the question, “Does your chewing gum loose its flavor, on the bedpost overnight?” did he feel the urge to escape, and he did. He Orbed out, and went back to be with the other Elders. Now Wyatt had all of the females to himself!
He could tell that his mother and aunts were in the room with him. He could also see them on the television screen. He recognized them despite the masks. He sensed some curiosity, apprehension, and other emotions around him. He didn’t have the intellect yet to know what was going on. But he did think that his mommy should be with his mommy! His aunts too! Before the nanny could warn anyone, or stop Wyatt, the trio of Piper, Phoebe, and Paige, found themselves being absorbed by the television screen as if they had entered a portal to another dimension!
The Leprechaun nanny yelled in alarm, but was too lat to prevent anything! She said, “Oh, Wyatt! What have you done now, sweetie?’ as she stepped further away from the televisions et, subconsciously wanting to avoid also being sucked into the same trouble. She called for Leo and Chris, to no avail. They should have responded, but they didn’t! All she could then think of was to try and get Wyatt to undo whatever it was that he had done. But Wyatt didn’t cooperate! She thought of trying her own brand of Magic, and then decided against it. She could at least make sure she knew where all of the remote controls were, and take control of them. Maybe the recording would be the solution. What else could she do? She had the baby to consider. “What to do?! What to do?!” she said.
The End of Chapter 5!